While waiting to have my oil changed I picked up today’s Lancaster newspaper.  My wife Lori is a native of Lancaster County and has obviously influenced me…as I felt myself opening up to…no, not sports…no not the local section…but rather to the… obituaries section!  All Lori cares about (being Lancastrian to the core) is who died, who got divorced and who had a kid. Period.   Debt ceiling? What’s a debt ceiling?

Anyways, it sure seemed like a lot of “young” people in the obits today.  Of the 19 listed, 8 were 63 or less. 63?  My in-laws are that age.  My sisters are already that old.  Wait, aren’t we supposed to retire at 65?  How can we die before we got to live the good life in retirement? Don’t men live to be 78? And women, 80?  Of course those are averages.  I am surprised at how many make up the “less than average” group.  Now this is a small sample on a given day, however…

Last month I looked at 2 consecutive weeks of the Sunday paper, which reprints the obits for the whole week.  1 in 3 did not make it to age 70.  Since that discovery, I mention it to every couple I meet with.  I ask, “At what age do you think you will retire?  How long do you think you’ll live?”  Minus the jokes we all make, the retirement number is mid 60ish, and the life expectancy is 80+ (surprise, nobody thinks they are average!)

Statistically, 1 of the 3 of us at the customer’s dining room table will not make it to 70. Not a happy thought.  This brings me around to life insurance again.  That measly $26/mo. policy I just wrote for a quarter milliondollars for 30 years on a 31 year old guy, might just get paid out.  I hope not! But…

So what age do you think you’ll be when YOU retire?  Here’s hoping you make it!  And here’s hoping you’re insured even beyond that.

Unemployment gave me 6 months as a Mr. Mom and a special introduction to fatherhood.  I certainly wouldn’t trade that time for another meaningless 6 months in radio. 

12 years later a recurring theme is readily apparent.  12 years of work, selling beds, cars, loans and insurance have been fun and occasionally fruitful, but really…almost meaningless.  Suffice to say I haven’t changed the world.  All of the above was a means to an end, supporting a household.

Decisions on employment could be second guessed eternally, but the underlying consideration in all judgments was my kids.  I wanted flexibility and freedom to be an active and willing participant in their lives.  I work hard and enjoy work, but I am not a workaholic.  After losing my own Dad at 13, I couldn’t bear the thought of being the guy who looks back on his life and wishes he spent more time with his children.

Those 3 am feedings and changing poopie diapers was not just for Lori.  Bathtime and bedtime were playtime.  If it was the straw that broke the camel’s back, it will be the piggyback rides that do me in.  There’s pages of stories in my noggin between peek a boo and training wheels, and just as many from that first bike to the first lacrosse practice just  3 months ago.

I’ve made mistakes as a parent and would welcome some do overs, but that’s life.  I guess my most sincere hope is that I’ve set a good example, as they learn so much more by seeing and experiencing than they do from hearing me lecture about life.

In 6 months I’ll turn 50.  By then I’ll have a teenaged daughter and a 9 year old boy.   Exiting college I imagined great things for a 50 year old Bri.  I’d have logged decades ruling the radio dial from behind the mike in some major market.  Perhaps I’d have retired triumphantly and gone into station ownership.

Alas, I’m just a guy making a living in Anywhere, USA.  Yet I feel wealthy as hell, because I AM LUCKY TO BE A FATHER, SO BLESSED to have Kate and Nathan.  Time invested in them always brings great returns.  They are my pot of gold.  So greetings from the end of the rainbow on another great day, that just happens to be called Father’s Day.